Tuesday, July 27, 2010

He cries so much...

So, like I said a couple of posts ago, our little man is not a happy camper a lot of the time. To be fair, he has had a few good days too (like when we had a BBQ at a friends house, or sometimes at church when he just sleeps).

I have considered things like reflux, lactose intolerance, boredom, not adequate food, and lack of sleep. I (and the pediatrician) have ruled them out because:
Reflux-He doesn't puke or spit up a lot- unless we feed him over 1.5 ounces of formula at one time...then he will.
Lactose- he isn't super irritable after only BF sessions,
Boredom-we have tried stimulation with toys,
Food-he is gaining plenty of weight (he is up to 9 lbs now!) AND he likes to eat every 45 min.,
Sleep-and we already know he doesn't sleep a lot, but he does sleep pretty well at night.

SO...The doctor thinks it is just Colic. Part of me thinks it still could be something else because it started BEFORE he was 3 weeks old (he has been crabby since birth), but I'll go with this.
I would LOVE feedback from any and all moms on what to try, if I need to reconsider something I thought I ruled out, and any other advice.
Major issues:
-He cries a lot
-He is kind of gassy
-He hates pretty much all the stuff I have tried
-He doesn't sleep for more than 10 min. at a time (pretty much all day 8-5) on his crabby days. (Other days I get lucky and he (and I) will take a 1-3 hour nap and is WAY happier)
-Most of the time when I hold him he roots (he smells me)

What I have tried:
1. Walks- (in his car seat)He hates them and screams the whole time. He won't keep a pacifier in his mouth either. I have also tried carriers outside (and inside)- he doesn't like the sling, or the Infantino carrier (where he faces me)
2. Music/Sounds- I have tried soothing music, loud music, soft music, loud TV, heartbeat sounds, running water, fans, and other soothing sounds. Nothing seems to calm him.
3. Hot/Cold temperatures- he seems to sleep a little better when he is warmer, but I can't seem to come to a concrete conclusion that he is better in the heat or cool.
4. Swaddle- I have two different swaddle wraps (and blankets) and lately I have been doing the TOGA swaddle:) (one arm in, one arm out) at night (so he can suck on his other hand to calm himself) and it seems to work. During the day...not so much.
5. Brand of diapers- I have tried Huggies, Pampers, and generic...they all work fine and he doesn't seem to like one better.
6. Gas drops- I think they help some with the times he seems REALLY gassy, but I only give it to him if he hasn't pooed in over 10 hours.
7. Driving (riding in car seat while I drive places)- He hates it. He screams the whole way to church (14 min.) or anywhere else- unless he is sleeping. He won't take a pacifier. (I don't go anywhere except church unless I HAVE to:()
8. Sensitive formula- I think it might make a little bit of a difference, but not en ought to significantly notice.
9. Burping him lots- It doesn't mean he actually burps all the time, or that he feels better...but I have tried it.?.
10. Swing- Yep, he hates it too (even if he was happy when I put him in it).
11. Ocean Wonder music/bubble thing- He stares at it for a few min. during his happy time, then starts crying again.

Things I would like to try:
Side to side swing (instead of front to back)
Moby Wrap (anyone have one I can borrow?)
Baby Bjorn (I think they have the baby facing out-word?)
Bouncy Seat with vibrator


What does work so far:
Food- he never refuses food (bottle or BF), and is gaining at least an ounce a day and eats every 45 min. or less during the day...
Holding him facing out word at a slight down word angle while he sucks on my forearm. (This has been known to work for 10-15 min. at times)
Me swinging with him in our porch swing outside (sometimes)
Sleeping on daddy's chest (sometimes)

PLEASE tell me what worked for your little one, or give me any feedback you can:)

We are doing pretty well considering. Our family (especially John's mom) have helped out when they can, and John is amazing at helping out when he gets home from work. I am just looking for some fresh thoughts/ideas.

Oh, and does anyone know how long after you eat or drink something it takes to get into your breast milk?
THANKS.

9 comments:

Rob and Christine said...

Hang in there, Angie, it will get better. You can try on my
Moby and Bjorn if you want, but I still use both so I need to hold on to them. I have a few ideas that may or may not help. When I put Neevie in a carrier and vacuum the floor, she's calm if not asleep shortly. You could also try a different paci brand, kangaroo care, massage (possibly with lavender lotion) or even gripe water. He might like being held upright in the Moby while you pat his back. Good luck!!

Kt said...

Poor guy (and mom and dad too!). I've heard that putting baby on a probiotic can help with colic babies. It's just a powder that you dip your little finger into and let him suck on a few times per day and it's supposed to help with the gassiness, digestion, and colic. I had to get it from a special company but we plan on using this for baby girl from day 1.

Hope you find something that works!

Anonymous said...

:(

There usually is no magic trick that works every time. I remember being so frustrated too. Thoroughly enjoy the peaceful times to get you through the rough times. Hope you get some peace soon.

-SVR

Kyle said...

I'm no expert on anything, but from what you wrote it sounds like lack of sleep to me. You did say he sleeps well at night, but I think babies need a ton of sleep during the day too. Also, you mentioned he is way happier if he gets a good nap. There might be other factors also, but maybe it would help if he slept more. I have no idea how to make babies sleep though. When Caleb was little (7 months-ish) and I took care of him in the summer, I would let him cry it out, and that seemed to help him to sleep, but I don't know if you would want to try that with such a young infant. I've heard running a vacuum sometimes helps, since it gives them some nice white noise, but I'm not sure. Good luck figuring this out.

Chelsea Ellingson said...

#1 rule: crying baby does not equal bad mommy! That's the first thing that is going to run through your head as a first time mom, and you need to dispell it immediately. :-) You are doing a fantastic job, and if you need half an hour now and then for some sanity, it's okay to let him cry- trust me, he won't remember it and he'll remember much more as he gets older the things you do for him then and not what you didn't do for him when he was too young to even know what he wanted! :-) Secondly: I'm not sure how long it takes for food to get into breastmilk, but if he's BF-ing fine, it's probably not, like you said, reflux. Although you might try not eating a few things here and there for a couple of days that you eat regularly and see if that makes a difference. Hang in there and things will smooth out eventually- it's a big adjustment, more than anything anyone could tell you, but (cliche but SO true) it's totally worth it.

Ginger said...

Hey Angie,
I am Lori's friend from SD. I know exactly what you are going through. My little boy was born end of January and (sorry this isn't encouraging) he is still fussy. A lot less than those first few months but there are still times he cries and I can't soothe him.

The things that "worked" best for me were
-carrying him in the Moby wrap: this worked for up to 2 hours most days to get him to sleep, but then you can't be sleeping.
-I took him to the chiropractor to get him adjusted and I still do, but that seemed to make little difference
-The chiropractor suggested giving him probiotic, I found a liquid version that he takes from a bottle nipple and I would give that too him up to 6 times a day.
-Massage his tummy in clockwise circles helps babies to pass gas. I try to do 81 circles
-I didn't try cutting food out of my diet because I felt like I would have nothing to eat then. I know people who have had good success with it though.
-My boy hated that car seat, the stroller, the swing, and the bouncer too.
-Letting him cry it out would work off and on for us. Sometime he would cry himself to sleep within 20 minutes. other times with periodic soothing he would still be crying after an hour.
-Swaddling worked pretty well but there were times when it seemed to make his tummy hurt more.
-The best way I coped with my sons crying was to watch tv while he cried. I felt like holding him let him know that I was there for him, but the tv gave me the distraction to not be overwhelmed with his crying.

Your doing a great job with Jay and you have good support. I hope my experience helps you with your little guy and that things get better for you. Isaac is my 4th baby and I am still learning what it is like to be a good mom and not a perfect mom.

Crista said...

Some things I tried, and things I realized after the fact:
~With #1, I was eating a full-size Snickers daily. When they were gone, she was a different baby - the peanuts had been giving her tummy aches and I had no clue!
~With #4, one thing I didn't "get" til after I gave up bf - he was getting too much foremilk, not enough hindmilk. I really wonder what would have happened had I realized it sooner and "fixed" it then. Once we found a formula he liked, he stopped pooping - he had a probiotic a day til he was a year old. But if Jay's not having poop issues, I'm not sure I'd try it - it was a last resort for us, and just happened to work.
~Chiropractor! I took #3 the most - she'd be (and still is) a totally different baby after a treatment!
~Mine all hated being swaddled, and did not like extra stimulation - is he fine if you leave him lay on the floor in the middle of a room, or does he have a fit? All 4 loved the swing. All 4 loved the bouncy, but not all liked the vibrations.
~I recall hearing foods can be in your milk as soon as half an hour after eating, but can take up to 2 hours to be present...? Don't quote me, my baby is 3, and the longest I bf any was 5 months - the others I made it to 6 weeks, 3 weeks, and a month.

Anonymous said...

Angie--I bought today an "essential oil" lavender based calming oil to try out when I'm there next Wednesday. Hoping it works! Cherry

Steph said...

I don't have a lot of advice for you Angie. I have had four kids and most of them were really easy. My youngest was the hardest, he was a very, very fussy baby, but he had reflux...bad! What you described does not sound like reflux so thats the good news.

You have gotten some great comments on here and tips so i would try those out if you have not already! Trying the chiropractor might be a really good idea. He was scrunched in you for 9 months and he turned just before he was born, so maybe something is out of place. I have heard lots of success stories about babies just needing an adjustment after they are born!

Hope you find something that works, and this will pass before you know it!