I have heard people say that babies make a marriage harder. I have found the opposite to be true- Having Jay has made our marriage stronger. I told a friend and she said "That is because John helps out so much". I would have to totally agree.
Early on in marriage we avoided some of the sure-fire conflicts (messy bathroom, toilet seat issue, blanket hogging) because we have separate bathrooms, separate closets and a king size bed with separate blankets. Don't think we are weird- it is awesome.
Now that we have a baby, it seems as if everything in our marriage has more meaning, and we actually do more together. Sure we both get sick of things, and when Jay was colicky we even got sick of handing him off to each other...but we have learned so much along the way. I'm sure things will change even more if we have more kids.
I told John the other day that I appreciate that he listens to what I have to say when I give him recommendations about Jay (how/what to feed him, how to engage him in learning). He said: "Well, you read the books and websites about babies so that I don't have to. I just listen to what you say."
On the other hand, when I had 2 snow days in a row a while back- I was going crazy trying to figure out why Jay was being fussy or why he didn't like specific things. John was totally calm and said "you just have to do this, and do this and then he will like it". Hmmm. I am so glad he is home with Jay and can tell me those things.
Our latest argument is about what is grossest: baby snot, baby poop, or sweaty feet. We definitely disagree with each other, but we get past that too:)
Here is Jay and I with the Chocolates John got me for Valentines Day.
Jay has gone on a walk every day this week! He lOVES it.